My cougar wife usually doesn’t let me watch her and her black studs
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Hmmm. She sounds like she’s pretty experienced. So, maybe she’s into letting her black men do kinky things to her, and is concerned about your reaction if you saw them. Reassure her that you’re okay with watching them fuck her mouth, smack her ass, give her facials, and whatever else–even if it’s something like having her snort cum from their cockheads. There’s also a privacy issue. She might like to be talked dirty to, but would be embarrassed at you hearing her moan with pleasure as they call her a BBC-addicted whore in the presence of her husband. In that case, give her the space to let her enjoy herself.